Dissatisfaction

We have everything we need to live comfortably; a home, income, daily food and satisfying relationships. We probably have more than we need yet we feel dissatisfied. We look at others who are worse off and conclude that we have no reason to complain, in fact we should be happy and content with our lives. We try to reason away our discontent, saying to ourselves that there is not a single reason to complain.

Still that uncomfortable and dissatisfied feeling stays. We continue searching for pleasure, looking for diversion, working harder. We might even go into therapy believing we are depressed. We look for a new job or new partner, longing for something or someone to relieve us from that continual feeling of dissatisfaction, only to discover that nothing works, whatever we do to rid us of that niggling feeling. On the contrary the more we try to do something about it the more discontentment we feel. It seems as though we are losing all our certainties, while diversions and pleasures bore us. It is almost as though our life is not our own any more. We realize that we are unsuccessful in moving our pain to the background. We do our best to understand the reasons for the pain but every explanation seems awkward or inappropriate. Our insecurity increases. We feel unhappy without being able to justify it. Life becomes unbearable and we ask ourselves if it would not be better to end it. We presume and so does our caregiver, that we are ill.

It is not a depression however, it is a spiritual crisis. We are going through a breakthrough. Our spiritual need is calling for acknowledgement. On the verge of entering a new existence we are scared, very scared to move into that strange new universe, one full of uncertainties, a world that resembles in nothing the one we are leaving.

This new existence is not about gathering goods and commodities. It is not about what we are, but about how we are. In this new world we exchange our self interest and our egocentricity for altruism and mercy. We trade our restlessness and rush for peace and quiet. Distractions and pleasures are exchanged for compassion and happiness.

Do not be afraid when you feel insecure and dissatisfied but gather courage and enter this new world, slowly, step by step